Updated: May 24
It's nothing like being so busy with motherhood, school, work and launching a business that you totally miss being three months pregnant.
I know exactly what you're thinking...Did she really drop the baby? and the answer is of course not. Thank GOD. But, I did drop the ball on several things involving babies like: forgetting how much sleep I will lose, rearranging my entire life to fit not one but TWO children now, remembering to eat when I'm hungry and really mastering being a single parent.
Welcome to my life, where my story takes several twists and turns, goes fast and goes slow but works its-self out in the end. Let's start at the beginning, where wanting a companion completely turned my life upside down but as you can see, my little bundle of joy has given me the push I truly need to see life through.
Have I dated good men? Yes. Did I ever end up with the good guy? No.
August 2019 I had three goals: Finish school, finish working on my moms house and launch my two companies, Spoken Royalty and Who Am I Collection. Apparently, that wasn't all I was doing as you can see. During that time, I was reintroduced to a former acquaintance, let's just call him..."James." I'll be honest, I SUCK at choosing good guys, have I dated good men? Yes. Did I ever end up with the good guy? No. Why? Because my ole build-a-guy self would always friend zone the right one and pull the good out of the one who needs to continue working on himself by himself.
Like most people in the dating world, James had a prior situation that he assured me was over well before he and I started seeing each other. Our mutual friend at the time even confirmed the details. Now, James wasn't the best. He needs some work but who am I to judge when I myself needs work, so, I stuck it out. BIG mistake! The longer he and I dated, the more I was finding out and the more I was losing interest. We went from being consistent to inconsistent for a whole year. I will say, when breaks are involved people change and move on and James...well, he moved alright-right back to his prior situation and boy was it a mess for everyone involved.
You can probably imagine how much stress I was under, dating, school, not only grieving my mother's passing but also renovating her house so my daughter and I can live there comfortably. All of this drama and stress led to one thing, he and I having "the talk." Yes, every man and every woman knows about..."the talk." Together, he and I weren't working and we both knew it. We tried but with our back and forth and his drama we called it quits but not without having "goodbye sex."
Here it is October 2020, I shook the drama and life is sweet. I'm focused on school and I have mid-terms and finals to prepare for. My head is completely in the game. I was working and studying around the clock. Here I am, putting my best foot forward to the point where I associated my hard sleeping and spotty periods with high stress levels. Pregnancy was not an option. I knew my body well (so I thought.) I completely missed every single indication that I was expecting. Lucky me. I even asked people to pray for me thinking I had completely over worked myself. LOL. I in no way shape or form was thinking of a second child, especially since my daughter is ten. I was living the good, life that is until November came to shed light on what I was in the dark about.
I wasn't sure, but I had a strong feeling I was more than stressed-I was PREGNANT! I dread having to make that phone call but I did.
Like I said, I was in a complete sweet spot. October I passed my mid-term and December was finals. I was making progress on everything I had put my mind to. November was the month to reflect and celebrate. My mom passed November 2nd and her birthday was the 13th so the family and I were planning her balloon release. I even had a wonderful Thanksgiving. My daughter, Amilyah and I were invited to a family friend's house for dinner. We the went to her aunt's on her dad's side to eat again and after that, we went home. Everything was beautiful until a few days later when I realized I hadn't had a period for the month of November. Up all day and night, working, studying and being a mom left me so in the dark about what was really happening with me. I wasn't sure but I had a strong feeling I was more than stressed-I was PREGNANT! I dread having to make that phone call but I did. James came with not one but two pregnancy tests. The moment I started peeing on the stick was just as quick as those two lines were appearing. Not only did my test come back positive but I even went to emergency to make sure and of course the doctor's favorite words came right out of his mouth, "Congratulations, you're pregnant." Not only was I pregnant but he told me I was twelves weeks pregnant. As you can imagine, the look on my face was priceless and to die for.